Tag Archives: Lord Mayor of Glastonbury

Some other pets now allowed to use dog trolleys to climb Glastonbury Tor

A public outcry has followed the recent announcement that Glastonbury Pilgrims Union has donated thirty dog trolleys to enable people to enjoy the tor with their dogs. These trolleys were necessary because the tor has grown by 30 metres in the last decade which meant that many dogs were no longer able to get to the top under their own steam.

This week three hundred owners of other pets signed a petition that was handed in to the Lord Mayor of Glastonbury the Rt Hon Lawrence McKnight, that claimed equal rights to trolleys for all pets.

In a partial step-down the Pilgrims Union have agreed that if trolleys are not being used by dogs then other pets may use them. However it is not good news for all pets. Very small animals may be expected to double up and share with others in order to avoid wasting space. So for example, if two people arrive with chinchillas, and there is a spaniel sized trolley, they would be expected to share. There are no plans to force animals from entirely different species to share trolleys, but many people think this will be hard to enforce. The rule of thumb is that if a pet is likely to eat or attack another animal that it shares a trolley with, then it should wear a muzzle.

Dog Trolley SignFortunately muzzles for a wide range of species are available in the National Trust gift shop if pet owners arrive without one.

Patricia Barnyard of the Glastonbury Dogwalker’s Trust remains upbeat; “Obviously dogs take priority. They are the best sort of pet, and this new ruling on trolleys accepts that fact. It means that dogs are never expected to share a trolley. They are always welcome to enjoy their visit to the tor, although there have been occasions when a queue of beagles has developed. On the other hand, if you want to bring a hamster or a cat for a walk on the tor it is possible that they will be able to use the trolleys too, and visitors will find a good selection of cat muzzles in the shop, on the shelf below the Hobgoblin Marmalade.”

£70m saved as Glastonbury twins with itself

Following the discovery of a loophole in the European twin town system, the Lord Mayor of Glastonbury The Rt Hon Lawrence McKnight announced today that plans to twin Glastonbury with Langenlonsheim in Germany have been scrapped, and instead the town will twin with itself.

At a press conference this morning on the edge of the A39 into Glastonbury the Lord Mayor unveiled the new sign that now says Glastonbury twinned with Glastonbury, much to the delight of the Glastonbury Signwriters Guild whose members have been tasked with repainting all of the signs around the town.

The Lord Mayor was keen to draw attention to the huge savings the council will make over the next few years; “The cost of flying the whole town council for pleasure trips at public expense to Germany every three months was going to be crippling. We will still be making visits to our sister town but we have achieved this in a very creative way, by dividing the town council in two and then inviting each other over for cheese and wine parties, where we strengthen trade and community links.”

In other news, the Somerset Cheese Federation announced the biggest order in their history from Glastonbury town council B today, for £1m of ready-cut cheese cubes, and Glastonbury Toothpick and Pineapple Chunks PLC saw a 30% boost in share value as trading started on the London Stock Exchange.